Just a boy, standing in front of the internet, asking it to reblog him.
I like comedy, baseball, pizza and you.
Today I bought red pants and I fixed a window with my dad.
I’m living out of my element today! No rules! Everything is different!
Either a person about to start a fight, OR a person on a train asking when someone is going to exit (but probably in an unnecessarily aggressive manner), OR a very confused romantic partner.
You know on first glance the expression “kill them with kindness” is pretty cool, it’s in favor of being nice!
But you realize you’re still killing them right? You have somehow found the only person on earth who gets weakened by nice words and actions. And you’re using it to commit murder.
"Here’s my seat on the train sir."
“Oh no please don’t do that, it actually can kill me.”
“Take the seat, I’m being kind.”
Congratulations you dolt. You’re a bad bad person *and* you lost your seat on the train, because the only way you can make that terrible situation any worse is by sitting back down.
I went to Missouri this weekend with my dad to see the Cardinals and Royals (and thus Red Sox), and some other things. It was the best. Let me tell you about it.
The grossest dude ever, I guess.
A very defiant person and/or a very bad waiter.
One time in my brief career as a camp counselor I complimented a kid’s hat, and subsequently had to compliment every other kid’s hat, with matching enthusiasm.
That’s the closest I’ve come to being a parent. Respect.
People always complain about crying babies on airplanes, but I’m currently sitting in front of a gaggle of old white people who can’t stop making dad jokes and it’s way worse.
At least I can block out the baby.